Friday, June 30, 2006

These are my words of the day.

Aficionado: an enthusiastic admirer; a fan.

Timorous: full of apprehensiveness; fearful.

Venal: capable of being bought; also, corruptible

They were selected for me by Google since Google in the business of know what everyone thinks and does. Even this blog is powered by Google, so they know exactly how I feel.
Well how else would they know I’m an Aficionado of beautiful women and fierce competition. With my enthusiasm I’m quite timorous because of my venal tendencies. Ah yes I just use all three words in my description of what kind of person I’m not. I’ve been racking my heads for some things to talk about today and I can’t seem to come up with anything interesting. Except that I saw a preview for a movie yesterday that I think might have summed up my life, though I thought Garden State was that movie this movie My last Kiss is hitting closer to home and ironically Zach Braff is in this movie. I think its has to do with all this alone time I’ve been having with myself that I’ve been just thinking so much that it hurts. Thinking can be just as bad as doing sometimes. I can’t and shouldn’t reveal those thoughts but its just one of those moments when you say to yourself “what the hell am I doing?”

I don’t know if this movie necessarily is answering that particular question or even giving some kind of clarity but it does give a snap shot about life in progression and regression.
Life, Love, and Time have a way of moving on even if you’re not ready to do so. In my head I’m still 21 and I’m still trying to figure out who the heck (G version) I’m suppose to be. I think about the girl I thought I was going to love for the rest of my life when I was 21, how that has changed is remarkable in itself. I guess your thought of love can be shattered when a person chooses someone over you and then gets married to them. Life moved on. I think about the relationships I’ve had in the past couple of years, some memorable while others where just tormenting to me mentally. People always say
“Get it over it!’
The only one’s that get over it are the ones who decided to end it, they’ve already internalized those feeling that were so outward, they’re Love has already moved on.
Then I think about recent catastrophes, Katrina, Tsunamis of 04, president bush being re-elected. The water has receded, the beaches have been rebuilt, and Bush will be out of office in 08. The winds of time wait for no man.

Well anyways I hope to enjoy my time with Hol this weekend….have a safe and fun Fourth of July doing whatever it is you do.

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